Showing posts with label Prayer. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Prayer. Show all posts

Thursday, October 4, 2012

Brotherly Love

Remembering Steven - 
My Brother and I in March - I Miss you Steven, I Love you!
Steven Earl ****, 6’6”, 362, 38 years old….Born: November 28, 1973. Died: September 21, 2012 unexpectedly of pulmonary thrombosis in his sleep. To most people he was Steve, or Steven – but he was well known to us as Steven Earl, that’s what Mom or Dad would yell when he was in trouble.  When we were little I used to put bricks on his head to keep him from getting taller than me – It clearly didn’t work. That may be why he started finding unusual places to sleep. We would find him sleeping under tables, on the stairs, any quiet place…more than likely anywhere away from his big sister trying to “play” with him.
He was a son, brother, husband and father. He was a friend…to all of us.
If you or someone you know currently has or has ever had the password *************(changed to protect the innocent) to one or more of your electronic devices – I know that you are a friend or family member of Steven’s and relied on him for help to set up your computer and internet. He was our techie – he introduced us to MP3’s, ripping and burning disks, wifi and tried to keep us up to date with technology. 
He had a unique sense of humor – of course many jokes needed to wait until kiddos were out of the room!  But, he could even make the littlest ones laugh. Steven was to them, a big kid. My boys always wanted to know if they could stay the night with Uncle Steven, or when he would be coming over again so they could play.
He loved to play games – whether it was a video game, board game or trivia game. If he suggested playing a game, I knew it was a good one. Fact or Crap, Trivial Pursuit, Apples to Apples, Rayman, Guitar Hero, Mario, Xbox, Wii, PlayStation…He knew them all and not being a ‘gamer’ I know I am leaving out many more.  I do know that He could be the most aggravating person in the world, he would annoy you and push your buttons until you just about lost your temper then could disarm you with a wicked grin and saying something perfectly silly or incredibly inappropriate.  He really was the king of inappropriate humor.
Mary, his wife, called Steven her “Laughter.” Through thick and thin – through ups and downs, Steven was her laughter and her rock. And I know that she and the girls were his greatest joy. 
When I asked for memories of Steven from friends and family, so many people referred to him as a gentle giant – and while it is not in print – a few called him Grizzly Adams. Here he was this big, tough looking man (did I mention he was 6’6”?), all burly with a curly beard worried about a baby squirrel not being able to climb a tree. His heart, his spirit through it all was tender…he was a gentle giant.
Steven did not have an easy life, he struggled with constant pain and inner demons – but this man through it all left us with an incredible gift. The gift of his love.  I know he is looking down on us all amazed at how many people are here to celebrate his life. I do not think he ever realized how much he meant to us all.
The little booklet (given out at the funeral) is full of memories that friends and family sent, the theme of all of the memories together is a testament to his heart. I know we all have special memory of Steven – whether it was calling him for computer advice, laughing with him over a private joke or watching him with his girls. He was a big kid and connected with his girls, my boys and so many other kiddos. They loved to play with him, they trusted him and would sometimes open up to him when they would let no one else in. He didn’t judge them, he didn’t judge us.
I feel blessed by his love, even now. All of us have been blessed by Steven in one way or another. Smart, funny and giving.
Live, Laugh, Love~
Vanilla Mama

Tuesday, April 19, 2011

A to Z Challenge - P

A to Z Challenge – P
P is going to be twofold – Patience and Praying, added together that is Praying for Patience.
I have been described at many points in my life as having the patience of Job…how did I get this? Was I blessed with it, born with it? Maybe to some degree, but I remember while I was doing my home daycare, I had two children of my own, was going through a separation and eventual divorce and I remember one night….I prayed for patience. Literally got down on my knees and told God, I can’t do this anymore…grant me patience.
I will not say that it was a mistake, but I won’t ever pray for it again! Never…no way, no how! (Probably not anyway, I have learned also not to tell God never – hehe – That’s how I was blessed with Frosting!)
Why?
How do you build a muscle? You break it down, you work it out and then that muscle grows back stronger, bigger and better. Have you ever thought about patience as a muscle? It is a spiritual muscle, like faith, trust, and virtue.
Prayer is also a muscle and it is one that I admit I am not very structured about. I catch myself praying in little snatches throughout the day, but I am not very disciplined about praying my rosary or dedicating time to praying in general. It is a muscle that I need to Practice using – another P word!
It’s really easy to tell someone you have patience, you have faith, you have virtue….but how do you know? Have you questioned your faith, but then allowed the Lord to fill your heart? Have you been tempted to cross A line in your personal life or your professional life and then allowed the Lord to guide you? Have you ever really felt like throwing in the towel, giving up, laying down and allowing life to carry you away…and then deep in your heart remembered that God would not bring you to it, if he would not bring you through it. I promise you…It is true! More importantly…He promises you!
What does all this have to do with Prayer and Patience…with Praying for Patience? You have to trust…another big muscle we work out everyday! We have to trust His promises for us, just like we trust the sun will rise. Everyday! And if you live WAY up north where the night can last 6 months of the year…your trust muscle is REALLY big, you KNOW that the sun is going to rise…it may take a while, but your trust it and you have Patience for it!
Lately my life has been one trial after another, it seems as if there is always someone sick, there is never enough time, there is always another obstacle in my way…and REALLY I didn’t pray for patience, but maybe it is time for me to work that muscle and stop whining. Maybe, just maybe it is time for me to put on my big girl panties and deal with it – deal with life and stop laying down and letting it happen to me.
Perhaps, -haha- another P word, Perhaps it is time for me to be patient and allow God to bring me through it.
Live, Laugh, Love ~
Vanilla Mama